Feeling very down today....and thanks to myself...I made a girl cried for me. I never made a girl cry like this...and this was my first experience. She asked me a question which i took quite a long time to answer. " If both of us get JPA and have to go to India to practice medicine, will you accept it?". This, for many people will definitely be a dream come true...but as for me...i am carrying a burden behind my back and have to go to somewhere even better. But, the only a request I would like to have from God, is to let us be together. It has been very heart aching and mental torturing for her and i would never want someone to be as hurt as this, especially for those who i care for the most. Ya, her message this morning did ruin my mood for the whole morning. She said that she cried last night after having a dream that i abandoned her.
What am i supposed to say....only God knows that what will happen one year later....Is letting her go by then would be the best solution, or wanting her to wait for me for 7 years and by doing this, i will be exerting more mental pressures on her and she will have a mental breakdown. I believe that i can, but what about her, I can't just abandon her like that....i will be totally selfish. Studying in different colleges, had made this matter even worse. God is evil to us in such a way that we are apart. Just 1 more miracle.... just 1 more and i would not ask from you much anymore, this was what i said to GOD...but he did not give an answer. One word to decide everything that we face..' Pathetic!!!". it is going to be sad next year. We dare not tell our parents about this matter. I wanted to take the risk...but she wouldn't. The tears that flew out from her eyes made me a devil. I was supposed to protect her....but letting her got hurt in a way like this was not definitely a thing that i wanted it to happen. Haha...what i care the most is whether she is happy or not. If i have superpowers like JUMPER, everything would be solved and there will no problems anymore.
God, save us!!!!!!!!!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Stop blaming yourself.you r not to be blamed.
ReplyDeleteit's fate that makes both of u feeling so miserable....dun be sad
if both of u are meant to be together, you will end up together de....